marriage

nope, not my own. but the other day in the women's section of cultural anthropology i learned a lot about the history of kuwaiti marriages. i asked students to think of particular areas we could study to better understand the way a society operates. the first response: marriage. then i learned  a bit more. 

back in the day (and i'm not sure how far back) this is how arranged marriages in kuwait worked. the mother of a young woman would take a picture of her daughter to the mother of a young man. once the mother of the young man had a few options she would choose a woman suitable for her son. after the mother made her selection she would inform her husband. when both mother and father of the young groom agreed upon a bride for their son the marriage was arranged. bride and groom met on their wedding day. 

ok meredith, and the  big deal is...? it was the mothers, not the fathers, who arranged the marriages! it was the women who, if you will, held the power. those of you who are married and are from the united states may have experienced the converse. while your marriage may not have been arranged, if you are the male you may have sought the blessing of the bride's father, and if you are the woman, perhaps your husband asked your father for his  'approval' before proposing. 

and so, the lesson of the day: things are not always as they appear.